The Girl King

Remember way-back-when when I wished for a movie about a gay princess? Well here it is! only this is very much not a disney-film. So very much not. And since I saw it with my grandparents, I am now dead. The Girl King is a Finnish/Swedish film about Queen Kristina of Sweden, and her life as the titular "Girl-King". And seeing as how she was a strong indipendent woman who didnt need no man! she of course is a great ruler, right? WRONG! she is torn between being a good queen, and embrasing herself. See back in the 17th century, it was not suitable for a queen not to have an heir to the throne.

But enought about the story! How was the film itself? It was fairly "meh". Some things were good, like the props. Other things were not good, like the acting and pacing. The actors clearly struggled to not sound like rally-drivers, but failed miserably. Mika Kaurismäki, brother of Spielbergs Finnish counterpart; Tapani Spiilperkkilä. Tries to make this a great historical epic, but the finished product is rushed, drags at ome points, uses the wrong gimmicks at the wrong points, goes for shock-value over actual emotion..... I could go on listing the things that are wrong, but I wont. Its a finnish movie made in English. They are generally fairly bad, for example Iron Sky. Fun, but lacked any deeper meaning. This is that again, slighty better maybe, but dont see it with your grandparents. The lesbian-part of Kristinas story is explored fairly graphically.

And since people were shorter 400 years ago, and this was filmed in real castles, everyone crouches in doorways like theyre Bigfoot.